I went to the market on Saturday. It was filled with people who were all from somewhere else – looking for a little piece of the big city life of hipster markets, lavender stands, and overpriced cut flowers. As I was taking pictures and laughing with my friends (who are farmers themselves, they are a late season crop and will be there as sellers in July) I had an overwhelming feeling of…sadness? Dread? Wishing for something that isn’t going to happen? I don’t want to get too dramatic. I didn’t have the same feeling of dread that I had on Sunday night while watching Catelyn and Rob Stark (are you KIDDING me Game of Thrones??) – but I still had that unsettled feeling.
When I realized that this feeling very likely just was a result of my own insecurities of being the only single girl in a big group of couples, I settled down. This has become my identity now – much as I try to deny it.
I need to create a new identity.
I have no idea what that identity is yet. I’ll start with the girl who is learning how to take pretty pictures.